By Terrarian Pony
Summary: So yeah! Lucky Dan is an involuntary member of a raider society. He overthrows the Overboss, and sends his raiders out into the wasteland to take up more of Crimsonia.
Author's note: While the following title is known as Fallout: Terraria, there will be a lot of Minecraft references in it. So please don't be offended. I am calling it this for a reason.
Fallout: Terraria (Raider King)
By Terrarian Pony
Another day in Mineshaft 27. Raiders have taken over, and killed the locals long ago. Those who weren't killed, decided to join this band of criminals. Few of them got in though. It's only for the tough. Lucky Dan, he only got in because I knew exactly how to work these Terrain-Gadgets. Lucky Dan, the stupidest name in Terrarian wasteland history, if you can even say there was beggining. Up to the the end of the war was pretty much all chaos, murder, and ending of all things good and happy, all the way up to... oh yes, Lucky's life as a raider from a Mineshaft, crafted dead-smack in the middle of Crimsonia, that tiny little piece of land of red that just happens to be just south of Mythrolhia. Everything can only go downhill from here.
Lucky:" (United Lands of Terraria my sitting butt. I've found more unity in radroaches. Crimsonia isn't a place for Mineshaft dwellers. Unfortunately, I'm not an ace at killing, raping, or even weilding a gun for that matter.)"
Unlike everyone around him, he didn't know weapons. Unlike everyone around him, he knew Terrain-Gadgets. And that's the story of his life. Raiders take his Mineshaft, people die, he is forced to be co-operative, he work for raiders, he sleep with raiders, he eat with raiders, and he trade with raiders. The Mineshaft is divided into three raider Tribes. One is the Mineshaft Devourers, the second being the Tunnels Rats, and the third being the Moppers (Don't ask). He wished he could just backhand every last one of the bloody raiders he came across.
Lucky pictured himself wearing a suit of power armor, and gunning all the raiders down with a minigun. He began to dancing in victory on the corpses of the savage animals, and screaming boasts at the now inanimate bodies. His fantasy disappeared when he realized the raider just beside him, holding an ak47, and wearing an uncomfortable looking sack hood, with a hose, over his head, had asked him a question. Both his hands were in bandages, the left one because he was injured, and the right one simply because he felt like it. It was Desmond, one of his favorites, mainly because he was always too clueless to realize what was ever going on, and he comes to Lucky for answers, and he is more sane than most of these delinquents. Lucky sighed and looked up at him, tiredly.
Desmond spoke to me in a Crimsonian accent. (Equivilant to a British accent. Sorry if my wording sounds a bit off.)
Desmond:" Oh, well I just saw you lost in thought, and I figured "Why don't I come and ask the poor chap what's up?"
Lucky rolled my eyes.
Lucky:" Des, when someone is lost in thought, it usually means they are thinking about how they want to slaughter every person in the room they are in, knowing that it's probably not likely, and then when they come out, they realize they have to except their work environment for what it is, regardless of what they want, or need, and eventually coming to terms with it."
Lucky folded his hands together on his rusty desk, looking up at him with a "Please understand my point, and go away" look. He didn't seem to notice it, or he just didn't take it into consideration as he continued talking.
Desmond:" Well when I'm lost in thought, I'm usually thinking about that raider gang on the other side of the mountain."
He continued his work, fixing up someone elses Terrain-Gadget that he was given to fix.
Lucky:" Yeah, well if you love the Quantum Brains so much, why don't go marry one?"
Of course Lucky wasn't serious, but part of him wished he would go and do just that, and leave him to his work.
Desmond:" I don't like them. They think that just because they're smarter, and more sciency than the average raider, that they should rule the whole Ocram darned wastland."
Lucky:" You could definitely use their education."
Lucky finished rewiring the redstone circuits in the small device, and moved onto the power source, a lihzarhd power cell that could power anything, for a millenia. However, the cell was somehow damaged to the point of no return. It was uncertain to Lucky how, but someone had really screwed this thing up bad. He would have to strip one of the spare Terrain-Gadgets for parts.
Lucky:" Raiders... I had to be acquainted with raiders."
And just when he thought his job couldn't get any worse...
Desmond:" Oh yeah, I almost forgot. Curly wants you, me, Dever, and some other guys to go out on a caravan raiding mission."
Lucky dropped his tools immediately.
Curly was the Overboss. When given the title Overboss, it means that whatever you say in your own raider territory, goes. The Overboss was leader of the three raider tribes in Mineshaft 27. If someone doesn't like what the Overboss has to offer, they can challenge the Overboss's authority by killing them in the arena, and doing so the Overboss's killer gains the title, unless they fail to kill them. The arena is set up in the mess hall of course. Watch us kill eachother, and have a fine meal while doing so. Lucky noticed that everyone was staring at them, and he started whispering in a harsh tone.
Lucky:" He does realize, I'm just a redstone technician, right?"
Desmond:" Yeah, about that, he feels you should be more coppertive, and social."
Lucky:" Don't you mean, more cooperative?"
Desmond:" Um... no, I pretty sure he said coppertive. And social, don't forget social."
Lucky gestured towards the hundreds of raiders around them.
Lucky:" We're raiders! What is there to be 'social' about."
Lucky did his best "stupid raider" impression.
Lucky:" Hey there fellow raider, how're ya doin' today? Oh, just great, I killed this wastelander a few minutes ago, and I urinated on his corpse! Oh, that sounds fantastic, maybe I'll go raid an entire settlement later and then defile their dead bodies by sticking their heads on pikes, because it's fun!"
He slapped himself in the face, and then sighed, letting his fingers run down from his eyes.
Lucky:" When and where are we striking?"
Desmond:" As for where, they'll be going across the bridge at bloodworth river. That's where we hit 'em. As for when, we go right now."
His hands hit the desk. The Overboss was losing it. Lucky was losing it. He was sure of that. In all his life, he had never been so internally frustrated.
He spoke with fake entusiasm.
Lucky:" Let's go kill us some chumps!"
Lucky began walking with Desmond and a few other raiders, one of them named Dever, who was one of the strongest men in the Mineshaft, "the" strongest man in the raider gang. He doesn't need power armor to pull off the tough guy look, yet he wore a set of raider power armor with an adamantite layer. He carried a quadrupled missile launcher with a bayonet attatched. Lucky decided to tune the radio to a signal called Vamp Radio. The Vampire, named Bonzio, who operated it, and was the voice of the Crimsonian wasteland.
Bonzio:" Hello wasteland! It's yer favorite vampire here. Today's weather, excessively violent, with a chance of dismemberment. In other news, there've been reports of a yuo guai attack up north in Bloodstone Village. Apparently there is a whole Mineshaft full of 'em. If you can, try to stay away from them as much as possible."
Dever:" Oi! Turn that bloody thing off, you mug. I don't want to hear those wretched noises. 'Sides, we're almost there."
Lucky turned off the radio, going back into depression. Bonzio's radio was the only thing that would keep him sane in this wasteland, otherwise, he'd lose even more of his dignity than he had already lost by joining these raiders. They finally reached the bridge at Bloodworth River. The dark red water hadn't suprised him at all, as everything in Crimsonia was red. Heck, even the water they drank was red. They hid behind a pile of rocks.
Dever:" Alright, you bloody savages, I want you to do exactly as I say, when I say. If I say jump, you jump. If I say fight, you fight. If I tell you to die for your fellow raiders, you will certainly die. Ya hear me?"
Lucky rolled his eyes and tried be as sarcastic as possible.
Lucky:" Woo. Nice pep talk. When are we going to get this started?"
Dever:" Oi! That's two strikes outta you! One more and I'll blow yer friggin' head off."
The caravan was approaching. The raiders readied themselves as they approached, and Lucky pulled out the tactical shotgun that Dever gave him.
Dever:" Alroight fool, take the first shot."
Dever:" No, I was talking to santa claus. Yes you! Take the shot!"
In power armor, he sounded even louder somehow, even though he was speaking through a helmet. Lucky lifted himself up above the rock, and aimed. He didn't know guns, but he certainly knew that a shotgun wasn't going to do to diddleysquat at this distance. His finger was on the trigger... he aimed... he waited... and then...
He pulled the trigger, but there was no booming noise. Lucky pulled the trigger again. Nothing.
Dever:" Oi! Did you put the friggin' saftey on!?"
Lucky:" Saftey? What saftey?"
Dever:" You idiot! Yo--"
One of the caravaners shot a sniper bullet right through Dever's helmet, blowing his brains out, as if he had any in the first place. Lucky ducked in cover, as one of them began shooting at the raiders with some kind of automatic rifle, the others weilding shotguns and pistols.
Desmond:" Why in the bloody nether do you have the saftey on!? Raiders don't use saftey!?"
Lucky:" I don't know! Okay! I don't know anything about guns!"
The other raiders began running the other way, our numbers dwindling. Lucky picked up the missile launcher, and swung it towards the offending caravaners, launching one rocket after another, completely annihalating them faster than he ever thought I could.
After obliterating the caravaners, they were back in the Overboss's quarters. He was somehow already able to figure out what happened while they were out.
Curly:" I cannot begin to exlain to you how you have utterly failed me!"
Lucky:" At least we liberated the caravan?"
Curly:" Yeah, after my best man was shot through the helmet. Why'd you even have the saftey on in the first place?"
Lucky:" I didn't know. I don't know guns. I know Terrain-Gadgets."
Curly:" If you can't learn be a raider, perhaps you can learn to DIE!!!"
TO BE CONTINUED...